L O V E M A K I N G   -   T H E   F I R S T   B E A U T Y

Sexual variety created artificially comes from reading or hearing, imagining some new sexual positions, techniques, as well as from your desire of having a new experiences in according to these fantasies. No matter what these sexual fantasies are, it is important not to describe them mentally while making them a reality. Thus we would be able to experience new erotic fusion more intensely, without the need of a predetermined scenario. Paradoxically a person can get to be a perfectly boring lover, even if he is not impotent. When we impose something, the inspiration and the spontaneity disappear. The erotic act is like a genuine act of artistic creation. The erotic act can become boring even for a refined person, because it tries to follow a certain scenario, or to have a certain image about the way it is going to unfold, no matter how flexible or innovating it is. This is why it eventually degenerates into a perished and tiresome film or, on the contrary, a grim, not inspired search for novelty.


The permanent search of novelty in the erotic fusion gets to an endlessly hunt for something newer, sexier, for positions or attitudes that are worth trying and also for new partners. Thus we come to talk about a "decadent", quantitative approach of love. When the erotic act has a map, an aim, so to speak, it becomes predictable, non-creative, even if you make all of your plans come true. Many erotic relationships are explosive, fascinating and charming at first but they strike out as time goes by. For a lot of couples their first erotic experiences are the most exciting because of the novelty of the person, of the body they have never touched before, because of all new sensations and reactions that are making them forget to think. Thus the genuine, total erotic experience appears so close to eternity. Yet the moment the novelty disappears and you do things out of habit, your mind starts wandering. Certain disturbing thoughts appear and hinder any attempt to experience completely the present moment. And thus the experience becomes a boring one as nothing has any sense any more. The couple keeps on living out of habit, but their erotic experiences are absent.


In a lot of these cases either the man or the woman will continue having a normal sexual response. They already know each other's body and needs and the most efficient ways of producing an orgasm and they will act that way. They will be able to have an orgasm, though in reality are way so far from a genuine erotic experience and they will continue to go apart from each other. We can call this situation a "masturbation" in two. More than that, making love while having a number of interior commentaries, it can lead to unpleasant situations. For example, if the two see the erotic experience differently, one seeking for an immediate explosive orgasm and the other looking to savoir a contemplative amorous state, it can only get to the disappearing of their desire for making love, yet this could happen only unconsciously. They break up eventually but do not really know why.


This change of attitude is valid for usual people and some concluded wrongly that the erotic emotion leaves a couple after a while. This is not necessary true and we will see that in what follows. For an aware and wise couple there is no reason for the two of them to diminish the intensity and the quality of their erotic and sexual experiences. In case that those feelings had gone away there's the possibility to get them back: they can be regenerated and even amplified. The reason why a couple looses that genuine erotic experience is not the time that the two of them have spent together, nor the intimacy. When a couple, that was sometimes a happy one, finds out that the ardent part of their erotic lives is gone, then we can talk about a real problem that is brought into discussion. In such cases it is recommended that the two should think about the wonderful feelings they had at the beginning or any other harmonious feelings during the erotic act. That is what tradition, both Oriental and Occidental, teaches us in order to create the premises of a mystical union and to determine the appearance of a superior conscience state.


Freud, erotic specialists Dr. Kinsey or Masters and Johnson, all of them, from different reasons, named orgasm as the ultimate aim of an erotic call. They also talked about the intense pleasure it generates. Yet, in the mystical sexuality, we approach a new superior state of conscience, born from warm and happy intimacy, where there is no rush, a complete opening to the person that you love, where there is no end and also no aim in the usual meaning of the word. There are so many sexual scenarios that control and rule sex lives of people. They can be categorized after the aim of the erotic activity, the psychological motivation behind each aim:

Aim (Consciously or Unconsciously)	Inner Motive	Sexual Scenario
To be a good lover	Pride	Technical carrying out different sexual novelties
To eliminate strains	Anxiety and stress	Masturbation that leads to explosive orgasms (either done alone or with a partner)
To deny sexuality, to avoid it because it is a sin	Guilt	Neurotic celibacy
To end as soon as possible	Duty	Submission till the partner reaches the explosive orgasm
To maintain the existing status	Routine, the habit	Doing the same things as ever
To be a normal person	Shame	Not coming into conflict with social standards and requirements
To avoid intimacy	Fear	Short-term relationships accompanied by promiscuity feelings
To make babies	Reproduction	Fertilization
To enjoy lovemaking	Desire, love and affection	Making love
To reach a superior conscience state	Pure love, unity	None